So, I'm having guilt and some self-imposed stress because I made a deal with myself to blog more often, and I am failing miserably at this so far. Thus, I decided today to share with you my journal entry from this morning. Yes, I still manage to journal most mornings in spite of my insanity. And, yes, I am opening those thoughts up to you, my friends. It's getting real up in here. Ready? Ok!
"9/23/14
Yesterday was both rough and refreshing, which is odd to say, as I struggled through the day trying to survive on two hours of sleep following a night up with vomiting Emry. She's such a little trooper, she really is. Through all the dry heaving and puking she never cried once. Just got a bit fussy. And basically, all I did was hold her....all day. I did work a bit - scheduling, supervising, checking e-mail...but mostly, I held her.
I'm not good at that often enough.
She was in Heaven. She excitedly told everyone we spoke to (because we had to phone all grandparents or speak when they called and spread the news that Princess was sick) that she was skipping school to stay home. Each person asked some variation of the question, "Is Mommy staying home with you?". To which she would proudly reply, "It's just me and her!" It was like rays of sun and rainbows and tangible joy pouring out of her. Talk about uplifting...and humbling. I know I could never do anything, be anything good enough to ever merit this kind of status and adoration from such an incredible little miracle. What a gift.
The icing on her cake was the arrival of her Elsa dress. She completely flipped out when we opened it. And she looked like a dream when she put it on. I got so enamored with the intense Day of Mommyhood and cuddles and her contagious excitement and twirling and posing and playing that I completely lost all sense of reality and somehow promised to create a Frozen themed wagon for her preschool parade.
This Thursday.
Heaven help me.
I have lost my ever-loving, can't-craft-to-save-my-life mind. What was I thinking? It's like I shifted into a parallel universe for the day. I even built a break into my schedule for today so I can go to Hobby Lobby for supplies. What?!?!
As I started to panic a little, getting overwhelmed by the insanity of my schedule and length of my to-do lists (because my stuff doesn't fit on only one list....and I have issues with losing lists), the little voice in my head went all retro on me and started singing "Have a Little Talk With Jesus". I tried singing it to Gregg, which was challenging because the male and female vocal parts overlap, as do the lines - so one person can't do it justice. Oh well, it's in my head now. And it made Gregg laugh and shake his head over the soundtracks in my head.
Then I pulled this verse:
John 15:17 - This is my command: Love each other.
If I do nothing else today (I mean, I'll do tons today....so let's say if I do nothing else well), doing this...showing love to others....that is a great accomplishment.
Always.
So:
Patients, here I come.
Meetings, here I come.
Errands, here I come.
Carpool, here I come.
Hobby Lobby, here I come (yikes).
It's another day in the life.
And I love it."
There it is, my loves. My morning musings, without polish or premise. They're a bit discombobulated, but it was early and I was only halfway through my first cup of coffee.
I'll follow up with my Hobby Lobby adventure and final wagon result soon. Just know that this will involve glitter.
Solidarity, sisters. Every day is an accomplishment.
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